Have you ever said or done something that you regretted? Save yourself from embarrassing situations from now on and always have a comment ready. There are creative solutions you can come up with to have something ready from now on if you forget an important name or make an unpleasant comment to someone.
An acquaintance speaks to you – but you have no idea who it is.
The problem
You are approached by an old friend or acquaintance, a former classmate or someone else you should actually know. Their faces vaguely tell you something, but… who was it again? The person clearly still knows you!
The rescue
The honest rescue: ‘Sorry, I can’t place you at the moment. Where do I know you from again?’
However, this rescue is a lot less pleasant for the other person.
The other rescue: ‘Hey, it’s good to see you again! How are you now?’
During the course of the conversation, try to find out where you know the person from. Ask gentle questions, such as: ,And how are things at home?, and, ,How long has it actually been since we last spoke?,
Often everything falls back into place through the conversation and the other person’s answers.
Gossiping while the victim is behind you
The problem
While you complain loudly about a colleague, a friend, an acquaintance or a family member, the person in question has been listening for a while…
The rescue
- The person is listening without noticing (for example from a few meters away – and you are not sure whether she/he has heard everything).
Finish your story quickly with: ‘… anyway, I just had to get it out. After all, it could be much worse and *name* i s/has’ (here is a huge compliment, for example about how collegial or friendly the person you were gossiping about is)2. The person has clearly been listening (for example standing behind you) and you see this before your story is finished (option 1 is no longer possible).
Honesty is the best policy! Say, ‘I feel very awkward and annoying towards you. To say it like that was extremely childish of me.’ Invite the person to have a private conversation and apologize again.3. The person you are gossiping about heard what you said afterwards.
Approach the person and start a conversation. Explain why you said what you said and that you think it’s stupid that you didn’t approach her/him in the first place with what bothers you so much. Then give tips. If you have said behind someone’s back that you think they are arrogant, say: ‘I sometimes have the feeling that you think I am inferior. It would help me if you would show me every now and then that you are happy with what I have done.’ Everyone benefits from constructive criticism!
Forgot your name!
The situation
You know the face, you know the person… but what’s that person’s name again? The most annoying thing is that you should know! Or: you shake someone’s hand and introduce yourself again, only to hear: ‘Don’t you know me yet?’
The rescue
- You reintroduce yourself to someone you should already know. The person responds, ,Don’t you know me yet?,
‘Of course, how stupid of me! Sorry, I’ve seen so many (new) faces lately . How are you?’
If you don’t know it during the conversation that follows, excuse yourself and ask someone else who does know.2. You just can’t think of the name of the person you’re talking to, even after you’ve been talking for a while.
Let it go and find out who it is later. Is it important in the conversation: ‘Sorry, this is very stupid, but I have completely forgotten your name.’ Again: honesty is the best policy! Once you know the name of the person, a lot of things often come back. Continue with, “Oh yeah, Ben! That’s really stupid of me, because we talked so extensively about… – I think I’m just not quite there today.’
,Gosh, are you pregnant?,
The situation
That one colleague, your girlfriend, family members, acquaintances, that business associate… to whom you ask the question ‘Are you pregnant?’ also states, if the answer is ‘no’, you feel quite awkward. How do you get out of this?
The rescue
- The person you asked already looks at ‘Are you…?’ very uncomfortable. Then finish your sentence like this:
‘Are you pregnant? You’re so radiant !’2. The person lets you finish, but laughs heartily. ‘No, I’m just fat!’ Then respond like this:
Laugh along and say lightly: ‘No, I didn’t mean it that way! I just thought you were shining so much lately. What’s your secret?’