Many have little or no experience with this subject as they have never experienced it or do not know what it is about. However, some of us, perhaps more people than we often think, carry this burden with us every day. Often there are moments of despair and the question of ,why me?, also comes by often. For those who still don’t know what we are talking about here, just a quick clarification. This is about a person in your family, this could be your father or another family member, who makes life almost unbearable for you. Who you cannot ignore because he/she is always there and you cannot close yourself off to it. You don’t know what you are doing wrong, but this person only sees bad things in you. So one can imagine that it must often be difficult to deal with this. This article was written for these people to give them some tips on how to put it into perspective as much as possible and deal with it better. I would like to emphasize that the blame does not lie with the people who have to undergo this, but rather there are some guidelines to help these people.
Who is this tyrant?
He/she is someone who has a lot of influence on the entire family life, which only makes it more difficult. This person often shouts and makes mean comments, without any or thorough reason. Possible physical violence can also certainly occur.
Everything you do wrong is often exaggerated and this is the only thing that is noticed. All positive qualities of yourself are pushed away by this person. You get a lot of accusations thrown at you that you actually know apply to this person. People continue to talk about respect while you get nothing from respect yourself. These people often behave completely differently to the outside world and are therefore not noticed by the people around you.
Most important tip!
Realize that you are not making a mistake! It is in this person’s nature to tear you down, no matter what you do and no matter how hard you try. You can still do everything that is asked of you, but mistakes will be made up if necessary. So don’t get this into your head that it is all your own fault. This is anything but!
Find someone you can trust
It is very important if you find yourself in this situation that you have someone you can confide in. Someone you can tell anything to, but you know that this person is not going to tell you anything else. This would only make things worse if your family situation were public knowledge. If you can’t find anyone you can tell it to, a diary or notepad can also come in handy. Write down all your frustrations, this can be quite a relief.
Try to put things into perspective
Remember, much worse things could happen too. Not that what you experience is nothing, but above all try to enjoy life in the good moments. Try to realize that there is something else besides the oppressed feeling you get at home. If you are a child in your home situation, realize that it is all only temporary. It seems forever, as if time sometimes stands still. The truth, however, is that time always keeps moving and sooner or later you will be freed from this tyrant.
Don’t argue and obey
As hard as it can be to forget your own opinions and just follow them, this is usually the best thing you can do. Often, going against this person and trying to defend your opinion only makes things worse. You will never be right because the tyrant sees you too much as someone who means less than himself.
Forget the accusations
In one ear, out the other. This is the best way to go about it. The tyrant blames everyone around him for whatever he/she wants. Often this is just to work out his/her own frustrations without you having anything to do with it. So don’t let this get to you and know that you are worth much more than what he tells you.