Toddler boys become strongly attached to their mother while rejecting their father. It is a developmental phase that usually begins around age three and disappears by age five. Freud called this the Oedipus complex, after the tragic hero Oedipus who kills his father and marries his mother in a Greek myth. By the way, Oedipus knew nothing about the relationship. Girls can also go through a similar phase in which they turn away from the mother and worship the father, this is called the Electra complex.
Contents
- Oedipus complex: from three to six years
- The importance of the Oedipus complex
- How does the Oedipus phase pass?
- Freud and the Oedipus complex
Oedipus complex: from three to six years
According to Freud, the Oedipus complex was part of normal child development. Boys start to feel strongly attracted to their mothers around the age of three. At the same time, they may reject their father for a short time and sometimes even completely exclude him or come to think (and sometimes even say) that they hate him. The peak is around the fourth year, after which it decreases more slowly and disappears completely around the sixth year.
Freud / Source: Janeb13, Pixabay
Girls are said to go through a similar phase where they seem to mainly want to build a bond with their father. Children will try to get a privileged position with one of the parents. Most children grow out of this phase around the age of six. If parents have a harmonious relationship and can make this clear to the child, the phase will gradually pass, this applies to both boys and girls.
The importance of the Oedipus complex
Freud considered this an important stage in the development of children. Children learned at this stage to love and build and maintain relationships. This theory has never been fully supported by scientific research and is not fully accepted at this time. Freud also thought that everyone goes through this stage regardless of the society in which the child grows up. This is also controversial, many scientists now believe that there are several non-Western societies in which children do not go through this phase.
How does the Oedipus phase pass?
Usually naturally, it is one of the stages that children go through to be able to build healthy and successful relationships later. It is important that parents show the child at this stage that they have a close bond and that there are no favorites in the household. Even if parents have to decide to divorce, this phase can be concluded well for a child. If parents form a unit towards the child during a divorce, the complex disappears almost silently. As difficult as this period is for everyone, involving children in the arguments surrounding a divorce can only harm them.
Freud and the Oedipus complex
Freud described the Oedipus complex and is the founder of psychoanalysis. His ideas about child development have never been uncontroversial, but they have had great influence. Because Freud believed that personality was mainly formed during childhood, the Oedipus complex became an important phase of development. Freud’s ideas, treatment methods and theories are still used but are also seen by many as outdated. The Oedipus complex is introduced in 1899 in the book Die Traumdeutung.