It sounds obvious… you have to make choices and after reflection you make the decision. But then it turns out that we have difficulty making choices that lead to a final decision. Now the decision about what to eat is less important than, for example, the choice of education, a job or how you want to organize your life. Yet a large group of people are inclined to involve other people from their environment in the most diverse decisions. Sometimes very consciously involved and sometimes learned from the past.
Doubt and intuition
Strictly speaking, there are many people who have difficulty making decisions. Various studies that include this item indicate percentages ranging from 60% to 77% in women and in men it ranges from 52% to 59%. But for a large group, the hesitation in reaching a decision has to do with how the environment thinks about it. How do people from the area react to a decision for a certain education, partner or whether or not to have children, etc. We find it very important what the other person thinks.
It is understandable that people partly act based on the fact that they are social beings. Yet it can, and possibly will, significantly influence your own decision . The question then is whether this is a decision that is entirely based on what you as a person really want. It is now where the environment has an opinion about everything and anything else that you have learned from home. That shapes you as a person, but going deep within yourself only yields what you as a person really want. After all, what you get from home is what your parents give you, without judging it. If you intuitively feel that at some point it is no longer what you want, you will have to delve a little deeper into yourself to find out what you do want. What your body lets you know is not something your environment tells you or what your parents passed on from your childhood. Your body can help you in your choice, you just have to listen to it!
Making mistakes is allowed
We find it difficult to make mistakes, on the one hand because there is a large group of people who punish you if you do indeed make mistakes. On the other hand, as human beings we want to do well and then happily receive a pat on the back.
But we seem to ignore the fact that making mistakes also yields a lot. After all, you are going to analyze where things went wrong, you don’t want to make that mistake again. Also very human. However, it will often turn out that you have not listened to yourself properly or that you have made concessions to something or someone that do not work out well for you. And occasionally you may have made an error in judgment.
It has now been scientifically proven that if you have made mistakes in the past , you have a kind of sensitivity when making new decisions (with some exceptions, but it is about the law of large numbers). Call it extra alertness. As long as it doesn’t turn into fear, it’s fine. So make a decision carefully and stay true to yourself.
Focus
Where things can sometimes go wrong when making decisions is the loss of focus. There is so much and suddenly you are no longer concerned with what you really want, but with what else is possible. Consider purchasing a new television. You think about what you want at home only to be confronted with a huge range in the store. Focus and at least consider what you basically need. The fact that the seller then shows you even more within that range broadens your view and perhaps that is also useful. Consider whether and, if so, what you will do with those extras. If that is minimal, it adds nothing and is just a larger expense.
So focus on what you are doing, what you want to do, what you want to achieve, etc. Focus is different from closing yourself off completely. That also wants to happen. You just have to ask yourself to what extent that is useful. Closing can also mean putting on blinders and you may then ignore other matters. Be open to what people say, but make sure that your end goal remains in sight.
Finally
Making choices is part of life and sometimes it is almost self-evident and at other times it is extremely difficult. But as long as you stay close to yourself and are open to others, without losing yourself, you are not doing so badly. If, in retrospect, you do make a wrong decision, at least make sure you learn from it.