Recognizing psychological child abuse is not that easy. Because children are weakly loyal to their parents, they are not likely to say it. But it is important. Because psychological child abuse can scar people for life. This can be prevented with early intervention. But what are the signs of psychological child abuse, what exactly is it and what can you look out for?
Psychological child abuse is difficult to recognize
Psychological child abuse is not easy to recognize. Emotional neglect is also often not clearly visible. Because children are often very loyal to their parents, they will often not confide in people to tell them what secret they are carrying. In addition, young children often do not even realize that the situation they are in is not normal at all. For them it is normal, because they don’t know any different.
Signs of psychological abuse or emotional neglect
Yet sometimes people can see that something is wrong with a child. There are certain signals that indicate this. These include:
- In very young children, psychological abuse and neglect can be seen in the physical condition of children. For example, a baby or toddler that receives little attention and has not been played with may lag behind in motor development.
- A child who, later in life, looks unkempt, has not been washed and wears dirty clothes can also be a signal that parents are not taking good care of their child and are neglecting them emotionally.
- In addition, abdominal pain, headache, fainting, hyperventilation and bedwetting in some cases indicate that a child is being psychologically abused or emotionally neglected.
- If a child shows different behavior than other children of that age, this may also indicate psychological abuse or emotional neglect. A child who is never praised or who does not receive love often becomes afraid and insecure and distinguishes himself from other children.
- If a child is withdrawn or gloomy and does not like to play with other children, this may also be an indication of emotional neglect or psychological abuse.
- Language use can also be a signal. Children who use a lot of swear words or swear or use words such as “stupid bitch”, “stupid child” or “if only we had never had you” in play situations, may be psychologically abused or emotionally neglected at home.
- The behavior of parents can also be a sign. Parents who treat their children poorly at home often do so in public. And if a child is emotionally neglected, this often happens in company. The child then receives little or no attention from the parents. It may also be the case that parents appear very unnatural when they interact with their child in company.
Psychological child abuse and emotional neglect often does not occur consciously by parents
Most parents who psychologically abuse or emotionally neglect their children often do not do so consciously. Most want to, but can’t. Because they are addicted to alcohol or drugs or gambling. Or because they are mentally or physically ill and therefore do not see the needs of their children. But parents who have relationship problems can also take poor care of their child and take the problems out on their children. In addition, many parents do not know how to properly deal with a child, because they experienced the same thing in their own youth. There are also parents who do not know at all what behavior is normal for a child and what they can and cannot expect from a child at a certain age. There are also parents who think that if their children are annoying, this is meant personally. They do not realize that a child has to go through a whole growth process and that this also includes annoying and testing behavior.
When are children at high risk for psychological abuse or emotional neglect?
Research has shown that there are children who are at greater risk of psychological abuse or emotional neglect. This is like:
- It concerns a “difficult” child such as a crying baby or an extremely busy child. This requires much more from parents than an easier child. Of course, the blame never lies with the child itself, but the parents are responsible, but the chance is greater
- A child was born unplanned. Mutual tensions can increase and eventually degenerate into behavior that is very bad for the child
- Stepchildren are more likely to suffer from psychological child abuse and emotional neglect. Stepchildren may find it difficult to get along with Mom or Dad’s new partner and may behave differently.
- Adopted children. Although adopted children are very desirable, this can lead to problems. Parents often expect a lot from them, while in practice children sometimes cannot or do not want to achieve that at all. In addition, an adopted child sometimes has many problems with the fact that it has been given up by the biological parent.
- If their parents have little money, no work or poorly paid work, the family lives in a bad house that puts pressure on the parents or if parents have financial problems, this can also lead to psychological abuse or emotional neglect.