Getting to a point where you no longer want to live, being in a valley from which you see no way out. What are you doing then? For all the other things you could do you have to use the power of your own psyche. You have to dig until you find what you know gives you the strength to live. Some people seek the help of a psychologist or support group, while others do it themselves. What can help you when you find yourself in this situation?
Contents
- Don’t feel like living anymore
- Find your base
- Basics found: giving everything
- Everything must be put aside for the key to happiness
Don’t feel like living anymore
The feeling that there is nothing left that can give you meaning in life again and the recurring thought that you would rather not be there anymore, takes a heavy toll on your daily life and can drive people to despair. There is no one way out of such a situation, the remedy is different for everyone. What is important is to go back to a certain basis for yourself. You have to try to form an image of what it is that can give you meaning in life again and go for it. You can be selfish in this and put your concerns for others aside for a while. That may be necessary when you doubt the meaning of your life and perhaps even consider suicide.
Find your base
Some people are predisposed to depression. A chemical imbalance in the brain then ensures that even though everything is going well, they cannot become happy and feel depressed. Events that bring joy to everyone else cannot move them. If the problem lies in this predisposition, it is a good idea to seek the help of a psychologist or psychiatrist. A combination of therapy and medication can help you regain control of your life. What is different, however, when the problem does not lie in a predisposition to depressive complaints, but rather in an accumulation of setbacks that have made you lose your meaning in life. Think of a divorce, a physical disability, money problems, a lack of hobbies, arguments with loved ones, the loss of a loved one, a situation of hopeless unemployment, disappointments in friends or pure loneliness that has arisen over time. It is often a combination of several of these factors that drives people to the edge of the abyss.
If you come to the conclusion that you have lost meaning in life due to these kinds of causes, you would do well to look from the other side. Just imagine if the most important problem you have in your stomach was solved. Does this radically change the situation? Would finding another job help you? Would it help if you built a good friendship with someone? Would it help to get back on friendly terms with your ex or with your son or daughter? If you come to the conclusion that this is the key to dealing with your state of depression, then this should become your goal. Your basis is building a new relationship or finding a suitable job.
Basics found: giving everything
When you know what the basis, the center of your problem is, then you can be selfish when working on it. You also need to put aside your reluctance when it comes to deploying resources. For example, have you been unemployed for years, but would you love to work in a certain profession and do you not have the diplomas for this? Obtaining this diploma must then become the goal for which everything must be put aside. You may be afraid of using what little savings you have for this purpose. You may be afraid of being left without a buffer after completing your education or course. Is this what’s holding you back? Then stop now and think back to the beginning of your thought process. What can get you out of your hopeless situation is taking that new path and finding that great job. Taking risks is allowed. If you don’t do it, the situation won’t get better anyway, so take the chance and go for it.
Of course, for many the problem is even more complicated. Imagine that your partner leaves you after twenty or thirty years of marriage. You now feel old and consider it unthinkable that you will ever find a new partner. Put this thought away! Many are in the same situation, including people of the opposite sex who crave warmth and security just as you do. The last thing you should do is cower into your shell and give up. Of course it is not good to throw yourself into a new relationship from day 1 where the foundation is not good. But end the grieving process and work on the future! If your basis is having a relationship based on equality, then that is what you have to work on and everything can give way to that.
Everything must be put aside for the key to happiness
Your foundation is comparable to the key to happiness. Life is short, too short to languish in self-pity and too full of opportunities to end your life out of despair. If it helps you, just think that you can always end your life, but not now that you have not yet explored all the options to bring about a change. Seize opportunities, or rather create them for yourself. If you need professional help with this, don’t hesitate. It is not a sign of weakness to consult a psychologist or even temporarily use medication such as antidepressants. Do what it takes and take matters into your own hands.
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