In these times of openness about homosexuality, recognized gay marriage and lesbian parenthood, you would think that sexual diversity should now be accepted in all walks of life. So no… Not so long ago, the general view was that homosexuality was a ‘disease’. It was taboo to talk about it and certainly not customary to come out about it. Those who had the courage to come out were generally not accepted, excluded and sometimes even verbally abused.
Previous views
The generation that grew up with these views now populates Dutch nursing homes. The views with which people were raised at the time were usually taken into the care home. People don’t know any better. Especially when faith also comes into play, people have learned that homosexuality is not appropriate and people sometimes even think that there is a possibility of being cured of this disease.
Back in the closet
Homosexual elderly people who have experienced an emancipatory revolution by coming out about their sexuality may be somewhat reluctant to continue this openness when they move into the nursing home. Especially if they notice that this causes resistance from other residents or staff.
It is not uncommon for people in this phase of life to be excluded and/or verbally abused by fellow residents. Pink elderly people can become isolated, conceal their orientation and therefore crawl back into the closet, as it were. This can even go so far as to deny their love life to the outside world by hiding photos of their (former) partner and behaving like a heterosexual. Feelings of depression and loneliness are common in this situation.
Pink runner
The ANBO pays attention to the pink elderly. They have an article about the Pink Carpet on their website and app. This is a kind of quality mark for gay-friendly healthcare institutions. These are the institutions that make homosexuality a topic of discussion, not only among residents, but also among staff. It is often conveniently assumed that there are no pink elderly people living in the institution and that is why no attention is paid to this subject among the staff.
But the quality mark was not only created to pay attention to pink elderly people. There are also staff members who do not dare to reveal their orientation, for example because of the religious beliefs from which the institution operates, or out of fear that residents no longer want to be cared for by them.
Tolerance scan
The COC has devised the Pink Carpet Tolerance Scan in collaboration with organizations such as ANBO, Movisie, Vilans and KIWA. This is a means to promote acceptance of homosexuality and bisexuality. It can also be measured to what extent staff and management consciously commit themselves to achieving this goal. Consider discussion groups, organizing a club especially for pink elderly people, or a daytime activity where gay men and women can spend the day together.
Gray pride
Fortunately, there are more and more initiatives to break the taboo about pink elderly people. A good example of this is Gray pride, a day on which a boat sails through the canals, just like gay pride, but with partying elderly people who celebrate their freedom and are proud of who they are.
The idea behind this is that everyone should be able to be themselves and be treated with respect, even in their old age. Especially where you live and work, you should be able to feel safe and you should not hide your true nature.
For more information, visit: www.rozezorg.nl