ASPD is characterized by an extraordinary dependence on others. Everyone likes to be cared for sometimes or to get help with difficult decisions. If someone always needs confirmation, cannot be alone and always needs help and reassurance to make a decision, they may have a dependent personality disorder.
Characteristics
According to the DSM, someone has a dependent personality disorder when they meet five or more of the following criteria.
- Makes everyday decisions only with advice or reassurance from others
- Always places responsibility for important matters with others
- Always avoids confrontation for fear of losing support or approval
- Don’t dare to start anything alone out of lack of self-confidence
- Does everything he can to get care, support or approval (does unpleasant things if necessary)
- Extreme fear of taking care of oneself is therefore afraid of being alone
- When a relationship ends, looking for the next one in a compelling way
- The fear of being left to oneself is obsessively always present
General
It is not known how many people have this disorder, but APS is found more often in women than in men. The characteristics also occur in other disorders.
People with APD see themselves as weak and inferior. They feel unable to function independently because they do not dare to make decisions and avoid responsibilities . They do not take initiatives and do not dare to stand up for their own opinions, if they have already formed them. They see independence as loneliness and that is what they fear most. That is why they make themselves dependent at all costs.
When they turn to a care provider, there is a danger that they become completely dependent on this person. The care provider must guard against this and will always have to be on the lookout for this.
Relationships with other people
The first impression can be very favorable, after all, someone with APS is attentive and listens well to others. However, if one interacts with the person with APD for a longer period of time, the lack of one’s own opinion and taking one’s own initiatives will start to irritate. Because not belonging is one of the biggest nightmares for someone with APD, he or she will try to claim the other person, which can cause even more irritation.
Relationship with a partner
People with a dependency disorder generally look for a strong partner who can take on all responsibilities for him or her and maintain contacts with the outside world. Because they are constantly afraid of being abandoned, they cling to their partner and do everything they can to please their partner. They go so far as to accept abuse and even blame themselves for it.
ASPD compared to other personality disorders
Avoidant Personality Disorder (OPS)
- APS: excessively seeks support from others, claims and clings
- OPS: avoids people and new situations, withdraws from conflict
- Similarity: very low self-confidence, fear of rejection
Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD)
- APS: lack of self-confidence, negative self-esteem
- OCPS: overly perfectionistic, setting too high standards for oneself
- Similarity: difficulty making decisions independently
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
- APS: self-effacement in conflicts
- BPD: extreme rages
- Similarity: Exaggerated fear of abandonment
Histrionic Personality Disorder (TPD)
- APS: docile and self-effacing
- TPS: Showy and exaggerated behavior
- Similarity: Exaggerated need for confirmation and approval