“Dreams are a fraud ” is a statement we often hear here and there. Rightly or wrongly, daydreamers are not the ones who are successful. And yet it is a bit more nuanced… because the daydreamer can certainly benefit from his/her dreams. This has now been established by an investigation.
Daydreaming
You can see a dream as a film of your thoughts, your brain processes all the impressions of the day at night. But daydreamers are seen as floaters and are not connected to reality. Yet it has never before been investigated whether daydreaming can yield anything, except a mountain of criticism. But that is true.
Reality?
Research by psychologist Paul Suddenack, who has followed a fixed group of people for years, has now shown that the daydreamer can make his/her dream more and more concrete in reality. This process helps in realizing dreams. The path to follow becomes more concrete through better focus and it makes you better able to pursue your goal.
The research figures are of course subjective, because it also has something to do with the person himself. How he/she develops as a person, character, etc. Yet Suddenack has brought together people with similar characters and future prospects and made comparisons here. What is in any case remarkable is being able to make the goals concrete much faster. As if the path has already been mapped out and part of the thought process has already been done.
How does it work?
If you are absolutely not a daydreamer, it is difficult to suddenly become a daydreamer. If it’s not in your nature, it’s probably not going to work. But you can always try. If you are a bit of a daydreamer or if you find it easy to sink into daydreaming in a meditative way, specific situations can strengthen you.
So daydreaming is not wrong – but keep it in perspective, of course – and look for that moment when you sink into your own thoughts. A comfortable place on the couch, a nice chair or in your bed, by the time you want to go to sleep. For some people it is a lot like moments of meditation.
What can help you with your daydreams?
Pride
Being proud of yourself, your achievements, is not a bad thing. But it is dismissed by many down-to-earth Dutch people as being out of line or just being normal, you’re acting crazy enough. And yet being proud is good (and expressing it), you can stimulate this by putting it into words in your dream. For example, by pretending that you are being interviewed on a well-known talk show. Honestly express how proud you are of your voice, your latest performance at work, a competition you won, your hair, etc. etc.
Repeat this daydream regularly and refine your answer to why you are proud. Also think carefully about what else you can be proud of and experience how pleasant this feels.
Good looking
People who are a bit insecure about their appearance can usually name the negative things about themselves, but in your daydreams you can drift off and look at the beautiful things and name them.
But what makes you beautiful? Dream away and imagine a nice sunny day in the garden or on the beach and just look at yourself. You enter this pleasant environment and suddenly you see the beautiful things about yourself. Your hair shines, the warmth feels nice and you feel desirable. Enjoy it and allow the feeling it does to you. While repeating, each time you choose a different pleasant environment where you enter and where you have this feeling. Both from yourself and the people who cross your path in your dream. See different beautiful aspects of yourself every time.
Angry
Everyone gets angry sometimes, but many people rarely or never express that they are angry. Then the why is completely taboo. And yet that is not good. We know it, but often swallow it. By sitting quietly on a chair and letting someone else ask you why you are angry (unreasonable, jealous, disappointed, etc.). You start to explain why you are angry and what it does to you. The interviewer writes this down and puts it in a drawer. Every time you are angry, repeat this and if you have had some of these situations, label the drawers and see where your anger generally comes from. Suddenly it becomes clear around your anger. You can also have the interviewer ask how justified or not this anger is. More put into perspective!
Create
Many people keep their creativity indoors and why? Because it does not meet the quality of the people who are seen as successful in this field? Because family or friends say they are well-intentioned amateurish things? Do you set the bar so high for yourself that it does not reach the outside world?
All kinds of reasons not to show it to the world, but just dream away and show your script, your painting, your singing voice, your … to the outside world. Look at the wonder in your eyes, experience that people like it, laugh at it, admire it, are amazed, etc. Not everyone likes your creativity, but that applies to everyone who is creative. But you will see that there is a group that appreciates it, enjoy that and focus on these people. What kind of people are they, can you characterize them? Repeat it with other art, other creativity that is within you but that has not yet seen the light of day. One will be better for you than the other and although this is ingrained in you, it can slowly become clear this way.
Finally
Can it hurt? No, as long as you seize that moment regularly. Just a moment for yourself that can strengthen you towards reality. Your focus becomes stronger and you can use that in the now. A matter of trying and persevering.