Dealing well with other people is sometimes quite an art. Criticizing someone else forces them onto the defensive. Criticizing someone else is hurtful and often causes anger. Is it wise to criticize someone else? What is the effect of criticism? What is the secret of successful people who interact well with others? Can you make friends if you keep criticizing others?
Sensible?
We are all guilty of criticizing others at times. But how wise is it to criticize someone else? Will you make friends with that?
Elaboration of criticism
What happens to someone who is criticized? What is the effect of criticism on someone? The criticized person will:
- Shooting on the defensive
- Making an attempt to justify oneself,
- To be wounded in his pride,
- Feeling less confident,
- Feeling anger rising,
- Feelings of resentment rising and
- The incident will not be forgotten.
Condemnation
Criticism is experienced as a condemnation. A conviction that makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. No one waits for condemnation, but they crave approval all the more. Someone who is criticized will not quickly forget the conviction.
Judgement
Criticizing someone else is interpreted as a negative judgment, a condemnation. If you don’t want to be judged by someone else, don’t judge others. Don’t criticize others if you don’t want to be criticized yourself.
Why
Why does someone criticize? A person can criticize because it is his nature, his character. Sometimes expressing criticism is a clumsy way to impress the other person. But often there is an underlying thought: the desire to change someone or something. To improve. That is why criticism is interpreted as a judgment: There is something wrong with me.
Change
We all know someone who we would like to see change. We all know someone we would like to improve. But, why not start with yourself? Stop trying to make someone else change and start with yourself. Don’t complain about someone else’s mess if your own sidewalk isn’t clean.
Children
Parents want the best for their children. Every parent criticizes their child sooner or later. Most parents apply the standards of an adult to a (small) child. Putting your child down in front of his friends may even have become a habit. He is just a boy, small and innocent who wants nothing more than appreciation from his parents.
Boomerang
There’s something dangerous about expressing criticism: it always comes back to you. Are you someone who criticizes others a lot? Are you someone who criticizes a lot of family, friends, colleagues or employees? The recipient of criticism will do everything he can to justify himself. Especially when there is unnecessary criticism.
Successful
What is the secret of successful people who get along well with others? What is the secret of their success? They do not speak ill of others. They do not judge others and they never criticize. People who get along well with others speak well about others. A great man shows his greatness in the way he treats the little man.
Character
Any fool can criticize, speak evil or condemn another. And most fools do that. But you need self-discipline and character to be understanding towards your fellow man. You need character to be forgiving towards your fellow man.
Sympathetic
How do we get others to think sympathetically about us? By stopping judging people, make an effort to understand them. Think about why they do things the way they do. There is no need to condemn someone else, that will happen on the Day of Judgment.