Shy or insecure? Tips to overcome shyness

If you are shy, this can be very annoying in everyday life and in social situations. You may turn red, blush, stammer and doubt yourself. Social insecurity is often accompanied by shyness and a lack of self-confidence. Shyness, low self-esteem or an inferiority complex can sometimes seem inescapable. However, this does not always have to be the case. Shy people can manage to overcome their shyness after following a targeted therapy, course or workshop. But you can also develop more self-confidence and reduce the problem by following some simple tips to overcome shyness. How can you overcome shyness and become more assertive?

Ashamed or insecure?

Preferring to stay at home when there are parties, avoiding social contacts, turning red when you are in the spotlight: these are all phenomena that shy people recognize. Shyness is often accompanied by a deeper sense of shame and the fear of being negatively judged. Shyness can also be related to a latent inferiority complex.

Can shyness be overcome?

Shyness manifests itself in social situations that can be experienced as very uncomfortable and stressful. Precisely for this reason, the shy person may develop a fear of going to parties, receptions or gatherings. Shyness sometimes seems so inescapable to those who suffer from it that he or she thinks the problem is unsolvable. However, this does not necessarily have to be the case: some people get rid of their problem by following therapy against shyness , or simply by practicing to become more assertive in everyday life. The latter can be done, for example, using the following tips.

Overcoming uncertainty: tips

Self confidence

One of the causes of shyness is the thought that you are worth less than someone else. The other person seems more confident, stronger and full of self-confidence and this can intimidate you. Put this thought aside: you are worth the same as anyone else. You have your own qualities and flaws, and also your own worth.

Don’t be misled

Some people become insecure because others seem so arrogant. Don’t let this fool you: often arrogance is just a kind of tactic that people use to protect themselves from the outside world. Don’t be put off by this: even apparently confident or arrogant people can be insecure. Know that no person is without self-doubt: everyone experiences moments of uncertainty.

Don’t compare

Let extremely popular or loud people do their thing; don’t compare it to it. Your personality is probably too different to be like them. And why would you want to be like them? Everyone is unique and starts from the same starting point. Shy people can also be liked and socially accepted.

Practice assertiveness

Assertiveness means that you can more easily stand up for yourself and become more verbally assertive. Shy people are less assertive, but can work on this. Learn to defend yourself in conflict situations and learn to speak publicly. You should practice social skills as often as you can and not just at parties. You can become more assertive, for example, using the following tips :

  • start a conversation with a complete stranger
  • to launch a topic of conversation in a group
  • to lead a conversation
  • have improvisation exercises with your friends
  • to take the initiative in a social situation: the easier you start a conversation, the faster the follow-up

 

Relax during stress

Sometimes shyness can cause a lot of tension for the body and mind. You start to stress in certain situations and conversations, which can cause you to become blocked. That is why it is good to relax so that you can release tension. It is not without reason that humor is a way to divert tension, frustration and irritation.

Humor as a weapon

Try to make a joke in company and wait for the reactions. Also know that self-deprecation is a good way to deprive others of the opportunity to make fun of you or make fun of you. Because if, for example, you say that you are going to turn red, it is no longer interesting for someone else to make a joke or comment about it.

read more

  • Easily turn red and blush: causes, solutions & tips
  • Learning assertiveness: 6 tips to quickly become assertive

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