When you want to make something clear to someone, you have to communicate. Non-verbal behavior is especially important here. You have to pay attention to the facial expression, voice, posture, etc. to receive the literal content of the message.
Functions of non-verbal behavior
Identity
Non-verbal behavior says more about a person than what is just said. Feelings are expressed more in non-verbal behavior. You can best tell who someone is by looking at a person’s posture, gestures and facial expressions.
Support verbal communication
You can support a conversation with signals such as gestures, facial expressions, posture, nodding and eye contact. This makes what is said even clearer, and in this way the conversation is also kept going.
Replacing verbal communication
It can always happen that you are unable to communicate verbally. This can be due to noise, a deaf person, a language you do not master, etc. You usually switch to non-verbal communication in order to maintain contact.
Regulate mutual relationships
People can subtly let each other know which behavior is permitted and which behavior is not. Without saying a word, you can make it clear that something is not desired or that it is desired.
Non-verbal communication can play a role in conversations in three ways:
Nonverbal behavior is obvious in itself
Words are not always necessary to agree or disapprove in a conversation. Signals such as nodding yes, smiling and giving a thumbs up indicate that the person agrees with you. If this is not the case, and therefore you do not agree with it, you can show this by shaking your head disapprovingly and moving your index finger back and forth.
The non-verbal behavior supports the verbal
This is the most common, a person’s expression matches what he is saying. This amplifies the spoken words. If someone is happy about something, this is said with a smile on their face, for example. If it is a gloomy story, then the facial expression is also gloomy.
The non-verbal behavior contradicts the verbal
It is confusing when someone tells a very sad story. The non-verbal behavior does not match what he is saying. Usually, non-verbal behavior is taken as the starting point, because people attach more meaning to it.
Aspects of non-verbal behavior
Way of speaking
These aspects are called colloquialism. Everyone has their own mixture of these aspects. The way things are said can tell whether this is seriousness or sarcasm. You can also hear how someone feels. When you are depressed, you often speak slower, more monotone and softer.
- articulation (good, functional, exaggerated)
- speaking rhythm (rest points)
- accentuation (emphasizing certain words)
- safewords (I say…, huh, so)
- volume
- timbre (timbre, loud voice, pleasant voice)
- melody (monotonous, lilting)
- speech impediments (stuttering)
- language use (ABN, dialect)
- vocabulary
Appearance
There are two sides to this, namely the physical characteristics and the physical care.
By physical characteristics we mean characteristics such as posture, hair, facial features, etc. By physical care we mean things such as the use of make-up, clean or dirty nails, clothing, etc.
These characteristics help you develop a first impression about a person. person. You can see what someone wants to radiate and how someone feels. For example, from their clothing you can tell what kind of work a person does, or what style of music they are interested in.
Body posture and motor skills
Your posture influences the way you speak and the contact with the listener.
Everyone develops their own characteristic features. What you can think of is the way you walk, sit, stand, move, etc. From your posture and motor skills you can often tell how someone feels and how they approach life. If you are not confident, you look differently than if you are sure of yourself, for example you look more at the ground. If you are very optimistic, you walk upright, move enthusiastically and are cheerful.
Gestures
There are expressive and representative gestures.
Representative are the gestures that have been given a fixed meaning. Everyone knows these gestures and are used to make something clear to someone. So they have a clear function. However, these gestures are different in different cultures.
Expressive have their own gestures, which can differ from person to person. These gestures are not only used to make something clear to someone else, but are also made when you are alone. Others can read your emotions from this, and it is an outlet for yourself.
Besides these two, there are also gestures that seem to have no meaning. These gestures have become automatic, and probably learned accidentally. An example is when someone scratches his head when he is nervous. We speak of a tic if these gestures have a compulsive character and occur very frequently.
Mimicry
By looking at someone’s face you can very well estimate how he feels. There is a difference between people, with some you can read everything accurately, and others really have a poker face. We know what the other person thinks about a conversation by looking at their facial expression.
The eyes play an important role in a conversation. Eye contact keeps the conversation going and makes it clear whose turn it is to talk. The listener looks at his conversation partner much more often (about 75%) than the speaker looks at the listener (about 40%). For the listener, this is to show his interest and to read the emotions of the speaker. The speaker often only looks when he needs a response and/or the listener has understood correctly. Intense emotions are also usually expressed through the eyes.
Close proximity
The distance that the conversation partners have from each other can be used to determine how intimate and personal the relationship and the content of the conversation is. This is divided into 4 zones:
The intimate zone (0-0.5 m); When you allow each other into this zone, it is a demonstration of mutual trust .
The personal zone (0.5-1.5 m); This is for daily personal contact. The social zone (1.5-3 m); This is the distance for not too personal things. For example at parties, visitors, meals. The public zone (from 3 m); General social interaction. In this zone one only has to observe the generally applicable rules of politeness.
Silence
People all perceive silence differently. For some it is an opportunity to think for a moment, and for others a moment of silence is uncomfortable. You cannot accurately judge from the outside how someone else will perceive this, which is why most people cannot tolerate silence. There is a tendency to say something, even if there is nothing to say.
Speaking in front of a group
Your attitude is therefore very important in a conversation or during a presentation. What you can do to appear clear is to stand upright with your shoulders relaxed. Keep your hands at the level of your navel, and do not fiddle with your hair, shirt, etc. You can hold a pen if necessary. Stand with both legs firmly on the ground, and do not bounce back and forth from one leg to the other. It is also important to look at your listeners.
Looking at one person for too long will make them feel uncomfortable, so look at everyone, but not for too long. Also look up from your paper regularly when you read something.
Gestures can make your presentation more lively and support it. Please note that you only make functional gestures. Gestures such as fiddling with your hair, scratching your nose, etc. are disturbing and not functional.
Also wear clothes that fit comfortably, so that you feel good about them. It is better to avoid distracting accessories. A bunch of keys or mobile phone in the pocket can also be disturbing.