You feel lonely. But how do you solve that loneliness? Because loneliness makes people sad. Loneliness is nasty and annoying and makes you feel alone in this world. But there is something you can do about loneliness. For example, spend a night in a hotel and sit at the bar. Or do volunteer work.
Dramatic changes
Loneliness often arises after a change in your life. A divorce, the death of a partner or a child, a move to a part of a country where you know no one. Or after you get sick, lose your job or suddenly don’t have much money left. By the way, some people are also lonely when they are surrounded by people. They just don’t feel at home with those people, they don’t feel an intimate bond with them that allows them to share everything with them. You can’t share your most intimate things with everyone, that’s always just a few people. Anyone who has 2 good friends with whom they can do that is a rich person. But if one of these two disappears, loneliness sometimes lurks.
Work on loneliness
If the loneliness is so great that it really makes someone unhappy, then there is work to be done. The point is that in this very big world there are always other people with whom you can reconnect, who make life more valuable. And those people may also be lonely right now. When both souls come together, something beautiful can come out of it.
What can you do about loneliness?
Of course, every person is different and every person has different needs in contact with others. It is important to first find out what you are looking for in order to solve that loneliness.
- Are you looking for a friend that you can talk to every now and then?
- Are you looking for someone to go out with?
- Are you looking for someone to go on holiday with?
- Or someone you want to eat with?
- Or someone you can talk to about loss, for example, a kind of fellow sufferer.
See where you can meet people who can reduce your loneliness
Then take inventory of where you could find that person.
- Is that near you?
- In your village or city?
- Are there any clubs or associations you can join so you meet those people?
- Can you book a singles trip so that you can meet like-minded people and enjoy a holiday at the same time?
- Is there a hospital or other institution in your area where you can meet all kinds of people if you volunteer there?
- Can you volunteer at a club that organizes events for your town or city?
Make a plan
If you know what you want and where you could meet those people, take the first step and approach those people or those organizations and ask what you can do. Or sign up for a course in an area of interest where you know you’ll be with like-minded people. Sometimes these are quite big steps. Because if you already feel lonely, you have often already closed off from the outside world. Or you may even be somewhat isolated from the outside world and already somewhat isolated. Try it anyway. That may be difficult, but try it one time at a time. Take that first step first, even if you go to a course, association or institution with trembling knees and sweaty hands. If you just have a nice chat with someone that first time, that might be enough to make you want to go again the next time. Anyone who takes a course with people who are interested in the same thing can perhaps ask after a few times if there are people who want to have a drink afterwards. If a nice contact arises, you can at some point ask if the person would like to meet up outside the course. This way you build contacts again. Don’t be too greedy right away. People who appear very desperate are often seen as a burden by others. Try not to get too hung up on people, let the contact develop naturally.
Get a hotel room and just sit at the bar
Anyone who has had enough of being alone or lonely on a weekday can simply book a hotel room in a hotel. Don’t take the most expensive hotel, but just one where everyone comes because it is affordable. Always take a book or newspaper with you. Then don’t stay in your room all evening, but just sit at the bar. Take your book or newspaper with you so you don’t feel bad, but open up the conversation with people around you if you notice that they would appreciate it. Have a drink, offer someone else a drink and just talk about what comes up. That could be work, free time or whatever is going on at the moment. There is always something on the table at a hotel bar. There is often a nice bartender who would like to have a chat. And it is not uncommon for encounters to take place there that lead to a second contact. If that is not the case, that is not a problem. Then just enjoy the interpersonal contact of that moment and hold on to it. Notice that an evening like this can suddenly give you confidence again, but also just a good feeling. And no, you don’t have to bring someone into the room to get that feeling. This often does not solve loneliness, but often increases it. With such actions (you can also just go for a cup of coffee on a weekday and then sit at a long table), build up your self-confidence and notice that you often feel good again after something like that.