A notorious worrier does not do himself or herself (and sometimes those around him) any favors, but that actually applies to anyone who goes too far in certain behavior. Yet worrying every now and then has a function and if you can do this somewhat effectively, you will also benefit from it. How do you shape worrying effectively?
Function of worry
It seems so strange, we prefer not to worry and sometimes envy the carefree mind. But everything has a function and the carefree spirit can also get carried away, which is not good (impending problems can be overlooked). So worrying also has a function if it takes place within limits.
The function of worry is actually that something demands your attention. If you don’t shape it the right way, it can become something that goes on and on. This is how worry often arises as we use it colloquially. But basically it comes down to a kind of self-protection, self-protection when it comes to possible impending disaster. It sounds heavier than it is, but it does indicate how your mind works.
Designed in the right form, it therefore has an excellent function and we speak of it positively, in the sense of consciously dealing with matters, rather than negatively. The negative image arises because relatively many people do not give substance to it in the right form and it continues to nag in your head, as it were, and it can therefore negatively affect your environment as well as yourself. Worrying is now seen as a character trait that is difficult to unlearn.
Shaping
In order to shape it you first have to know what you are doing wrong and for most people they do not shape the thoughts that arise in the right way, it then continues to nagging and so it becomes a negative image.
What should you pay attention to now?
- Write down what your worries are about. Often the thoughts are quite vague and by writing them down you make them more concrete. It is more specific to make a division, because there are things over which you have no influence and you must therefore let go. And the things you can take action on.
- For the person who worries frequently, letting go of things (letting go is about interpretations that you have to put aside) that you have no influence on is not easy. You can do it demonstratively by writing them down on pieces of paper that you then burn or shred. It has been found that if you do it this way a few times, it starts to work in your mind.
- This is counterbalanced by functional worrying and if you do this from a winning mentality, the chance of success is greater (your approach will be successful!). Your mind works with these images in such a way that it gives you a kind of small head start. This small advantage increases your chance of real success.
- Very important for everyone, but especially for the worrier, is trying to relax. A tense mind is more likely to produce a kind of tunnel vision and the chance that you will go overboard in your worrying behavior is then greater. A relaxed mind (and corresponding body) is usually more likely to yield new insights and ideas. Expanding the mental capabilities is always better when solving a problem.
- You can also shape functional worrying by putting it aside for a while and looking at it from the third person at a later time. If you are also able to do it from a “big mind”, then the chance of putting things into perspective is greater. Think of someone you describe as a “great mind” and imagine that he/she must resolve the issue in his/her own way.
Finally
All in all, worrying, if properly designed, does not have to be negative. It is important to let go of things that you cannot influence and look at things that you can do something with in different ways. The chance of success is then greatest and with that you also get rid of the negative image of worrying.